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Writer's pictureJenny Willis, RDH

I cried twice yesterday

When is the last time you cried? I've learned crying is a skill. Sometimes we hold ourselves back because we don't want to ruin our makeup, or we don't want to draw attention to ourselves, or maybe we think it's weak. Or maybe we've forgotten how.


I cried twice yesterday.


My first tears came from feelings of betrayal from a family member. My eyes felt hot with heat permeating from behind them. I could feel the sting of tears wanting to emerge, trying to find their way out all while they felt trapped. My throat felt constricted and tight and my breathing was shallow. My jaw felt tense and stiff.


My second set of tears came from feelings of gratitude and love towards a friend. These tears flowed a little more easily and maybe it was because my eyes were primed with tears from earlier in the day, or maybe not. I cried as I was the recipient of an act of love that I know I will never be able to pay back. These tears were caught up in my throat and they felt like a hard ball as I was trying to talk and was unable


My tears were completely unrelated in their origin and came about because of different emotions, betrayal and love and gratitude.


I've heard it said that tears are liquid emotions. When we cry, we release powerful hormones, oxytocin and endorphins. Our sense of well-being is elevated when we allow the tears to flow and we are able to release pain.


Oxytocin is a chemical messenger that influences our relationships and social connections. It can help with the emotions of trust and stability. Oxytocin is a hormone that serves in childbirth and so knowing this helps us understand that it can bring calming effects to our mood.


Endorphins are uppers and when we've just finished exercising, we get a rush or endorphins. Endorphins help reduce stress and relieve pain.


I like to think of crying as a skill. And crying is something we have to give ourselves permission to do. Learning how to fully feel the depths of some emotions that might not feel good is a good place to start. Breathing through these early emotions and triggers and really learning how to be with sadness, anger, defeat, joy, gratitude, loneliness, etc will help us unearth what is keeping the tears from flowing.


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