I'm not sure where this quote came from, but I've heard it for years and it's always stuck with me. Everybody has their own journey. We hear this all the time, but do we really internalize it?
I think in our modern society, social media is the number one culprit and thief to us having and experiencing our own personal joy. It's really easy to get sucked in to the emotional culture of social media where people post their accomplishments, happy moments, vacations on sunny beaches and family time where everybody is smiling and happy. You don't see the ugly, real life stuff that is all of our shared, human realities -lost jobs, debt, sickness or illness, the tears of loneliness and the deep pain of betrayal. It always seems like everybody else is having more fun than you, right?
When we compare our successes, achievements, possessions or life style to another persons, it can lead to feelings of inadequacy. Our successes and accomplishments that we were once proud of, diminish when we hear about other people and their accomplishments. We can start to feel dissatisfied with a life that we were previously satisfied with until we start to compare ourselves to others. Comparing ourselves to others will steal our joy and rob us of beautiful things like happiness, and feelings of pride and ownership in our own lives.
How do we avoid comparing ourselves to others? The first step is being aware of when you start to compare yourself to others. Are there people that you constantly compare yourself to? Learning what your beginning thoughts and actions are before you start to spiral in comparison will be helpful. Catch yourself early and at the beginning to pull yourself out.
Sometimes as much as we try to avoid comparing ourselves to others, others may like to knock us down to make themselves feel better. Try to limit your interactions with these people and keep positive, supportive people in your social group.
Having a list of strengths and accomplisments that you can go to will be an easy reminder of just how amazing you are. What have you worked through to get to where you are at? Most likely there will be many hardships that others are not aware of that you have had to work through. Hold these things close to you and make them easy to recall.
Remind yourself just how much energy you are putting into comparison and judgement of yourself. It can occupy a lot space and create a lot of turmoil in our minds. One of my coach friends said to me one time, "emotions take space." It might not seem like a profound statement, but for me at the time it was. When we take up head space processing feelings of inadequacy, it leaves less space for us to feel joy, peace or fulfillment. We only have so much brain space, don't fill it with garbage!
Learning how to stay in our own lane and keep ourself in check will help us experience and appreciate the love that is around us. We will be focused on more important things and will be able to happy for somebodys accomplishments all while showing gratitude to ourselves. Acknowledge others successes, and scroll on through as you hold you accomplishments close to your heart.
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